Challenge: Eat ALL the chips!

I consider it a duty when I’m in another country to try out all of the potato chip flavors.

It’s hard work, but somebody has to do it.

My two all-time favorite potato chips are Utz Cheddar and Sour Cream, from the lovely eastern part of the United States, and Calbee Kimchi, from the lovely country of Japan.

I like to buy a bag of these and eat them until my teeth hurt, at which point I throw the bag away. Hmmm...that sounds very unhealthy when I type it out.

If I had to have Lay’s or Ruffles Cheddar and Sour Cream, I would, but I personally think Utz is the best. (Oh, hai, Utz people! Yes, I am available for commercials and other advertisements!)

We bought these for $3 in Malaysia, and they were worth every penny. Even though they are Ruffles, it's okay. God, I love cheddar and sour cream chips.

Calbee Kimchi chips are also indescribably delicious. That is, they’re delicious if you are the kind of person who likes delicious things. They were hard to find in Japan, and when I did find them, I would buy several bags at once. “Family size” doesn’t really exist in Asia, so it’s not like I was being all crazy by buying a bunch of bags. Greedy, yes. Crazy, no.

I’m still searching for my favorite chip in Thailand, but right now the frontrunner is called SHOCK! They put the exclamation mark there, not me, and I assume it’s because they’re so addicting; the spicy chili and fake tart lime add up to a freaking amazing bit of junk food.

Okay, turns out they didn't put the exclamation mark there, but I think it would be much better if they were called SHOCK!

Sometimes I’m really happy to perform this experiment, like when I get to eat SHOCK! chips. Or when I find something unexpectedly yummy. Then I’m like, Eat ALL the chips!

I was sure these were going to be awful--hello, seafood chips?--but they were actually quite good. I don't like being wrong, but sometimes it's okay.

But sometimes I’m like, Eat ALL the chips?

You, hot chili squid chips, are a disgrace to chips worldwide.

Why, oh why, did I think I would like hot chili squid chips? Oh, that’s right, because I’m always thinking, You know, I’m a woman of the world. I like things that other people would find awful. I’m sure these are going to be an interesting and delicious experience. I will love these and then I will be able to feel superior to the other foreigners who think they are gross.

Yeah. That never really works out for me. I always think the thing is disgusting and then I feel terrible about myself because it turns out I’m not a woman of the world, after all. Then I remember I’m actually kind of picky about food and I don’t really like things that other people would find awful. That means I can no longer feel superior to anybody. I’m just as bad as everybody else, if not worse, because I’m also Judgey McJudgerson.

Yes, it’s true, a bag of hot chili squid potato chips can make me think all of these things.

Sigh.

Anyway, as far as chips go, the biggest abomination of all time has to be this gem:

Stop freaking out. You didn't have to eat them.

We bought them in Malaysia, but I recently saw them in Bangkok, as well. You Asians and your crazy chip flavors!

But, seriously, folks, these things were disgusting. As you would expect, really. I was holding out hope that they would be truly fantastic and that I would go the rest of my life rhapsodizing about the blueberry and hazelnut Pringles I had in Malaysia, and earnestly saying, No, seriously, they were amazing. You just don’t know, when people looked at me with doubt in their eyes.

Uh, no. They tasted like compressed, dehydrated potato (like Pringles, in other words), sprinkled with the fake blueberry flavor of a Pop-Tart. It was a very disturbing sensation, one I hope never to have to repeat.

So far I’ve found some really delicious chips and some really awful chips, but honestly, nothing beats those good ol’ cheddar and sour cream chips. I wish it were not so, but there it is.

I just want to point out, for no reason at all, that it’s probably perfectly legal to send cheddar and sour cream potato chips through international mail. Also, completely related to nothing, you can email me for my address, and I do accept gifts.

Final Score

Eating All the Chips: 1         Megan: 0

I haven’t had the time or the energy to eat ALL the chips, and I’ve been really gun shy since the hot chili squid incident. Unfortunately, the chips are winning right now, but I plan to keep at it and give them the smackdown soon.

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15 Comments

Filed under Daily Challenge, Food, Thailand

15 responses to “Challenge: Eat ALL the chips!

  1. jess

    Kimchee chips?! I love kimchee! I think I would love kimchee chips, too. And I’ve never had those Utz-es, but Utz are the most amazing chippers. I mean, I will eat Kettle Chips and be perfectly happy. But those Utz people have some mean voodoo with their stuff.

    Your description of the Pringles made me feel like I was tasting them myself, even though I thank you for saving me from that actual experience. It sounds like licking a sidewalk.

  2. jo

    Oh ugh. The blueberry hazelnut! I’m gagging a little at the thought of it.

    We shop at the international market and I LOVE wasabi peas. My sister and Nick have a thing for the shrimp chips… the smell of them makes me gag. More power to you for trying all these out. And Hi! Sawatdi (sp?)! Hope you’re having a great time!

    • Not a huge fan of shrimp chips myself…and I bought what I thought were wasabi peas here and turned out they were squid flavored. Talk about gagging…

      And hi back! I am having a great time, thanks, though I also miss everyone! :)

  3. Hilarious! Thanks for stopping by my blog, btw. I’m excited to have found yours!

    I am kind of obsessed with noodles, by the way. I am now going to have to try and find my own substitute version of your fabulous looking noodles here in Madison, WI. Wish me luck!

  4. Grant

    That blueberry hazelnut thing is really more disgusting than the ad for all of those pig guts and goat testicles. I can’t believe that exists. Wow, it must be crazy over there.

  5. Okay I’m a big fan of Mad Men and no I do not remember the Utz ad.

    Secondly, I heard the Brits are into some crazy chip flavors themselves. I think it’s like a second religion over there.

    Lastly, you MUST try durian chips. I know, I know they smell like a wet fart and I’ve never touched it in its ripe creamy form but the chips are delish.

    Promise.

  6. Pingback: Challenge: Still Eating ALL the Chips! « Bangkok Reality Smackdown

  7. Pingback: Eating ALL the Chips: Part 5 | Bangkok Reality Smackdown

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